Just wanted to send you and update on my life
God has really been doing lots in my life.
Sorry that I haven’t written in ages, it has been really difficult from the places that I have been.
I spent the last two months traveling throughout the Middle East and studying the Bible and learning things about God i never knew before, and learning about his heart for people.
It has been so SO good! Unfortunately I have had to be really careful with what I have posted or sent on the Internet because it is sensitive in this part of the world, and things are closely monitored. But now I am in Greece and so on with the discussions!
I don’t even know where to begin, I guess at the beginning! Starting just after new years we studied in Egypt for about a month.
We stayed in Cairo for a total of two weeks, and Alexandria for two weeks. We read a book of the Bible every day (or just about) and spent time really getting deep into the Word and who God is. For me He really brought me through a lot of His character. It was a really good time; God was (and still is) doing a lot in me. I have been struggling through a lot, thinking a lot, reflecting, and through it God has been teaching me really important things i need to continue on this track and make a difference in the world.
I really had a hard time not doing as much ministry in Egypt. I see now that being away from it and just focusing on God and His Word was what exactly what I needed to remind me why I am here doing this program. That God has put a passion in me for people, and during my time in Egypt and Israel, I saw that passion in me rise up, and now I am more ready than ever to get out there and love and serve His children that He loves.
In Egypt we went into a place called Garbage City, where all the trash from Cairo goes to and peoples entire lives are based around sorting through the trash. They literally live amongst all the garbage. It was so heartbreaking, yet at the same time the people were amazing. I played ball with a kid for a bit, and he just seemed so content. It never ceases to amaze me how people can live in the worst situations and yet still have joy. And something that I have come to see is that I have just as much to learn from them as i have to teach them. If not more. This life excites me!
After the month in Egypt we got on a bus and went to Israel. Getting over the border was absolutely ridiculous; it literally took us two hours.
But once we got into Israel, I quickly fell in love with it.
It was incredible, and early on I felt that God had a lot to teach me about Himself and the work of His Son in that land.
I struggled a lot at the beginning. I didnt know what to make of all of it. I had so many questions I needed answered. We were still studying the Bible at this point, and also going into Jerusalem and Bethlehem and seeing the sights. It all seemed so extravagent and complicated, and it was too much to take in. All the conflict and pain, all the religions, all the people living together yet in their own complex worlds. AHH. I knew there had to come a point where God broke my heart, because of all places in the world, this was the place I felt Him most. Yet there was this resistence in me. Because of all these questions….
Then.
We had a prayer session in Jerusalem at the International House of Prayer ON the Mount of Olives, and God was faithful to encounter me in that place. We signed up for a 12 hour prayer time, from 8 pm to 8 am. I didnt know when in that time I would want to stop, I had no agenda, I just started praying at 8….and kept praying. At about 2 am i was super tired, and I decided to go to sleep, so i went downstairs to find a bed. I was just getting ready to sleep when my friend came and asked me to come back because her and a few others wanted to pray for me. So i did, and my life shifted. I dont know how to explain it, so i will keep it simple. Through my friends prayers He showed me that I am beautiful and precious to Him, despite what I have always believed. And that in order to love people like He wants me to, I have to first learn to love and accept myself, so I can stop being so selfish. And so since then I have been on a journey to discover what that means. My friend Lindsay got a word for me that He wants to reveal His love to me through Song of Solomon, so I have been reading that as much as possible. And God has been faithful to reveal. Every day I am more and more amazed at His faithfulness, and love, and every day I feel joy in knowing that I am my beloved’s and He is mine. And because of this joy i want to scream it out and love everyone because He loves them, and well, it all just makes sense now. Thanks Jesus.
So yeah, through all of this, God has been changing me in incredible ways.
We left Israel, spent some time in Turkey, and now I am in Greece. I am still learning and growing, and it is exciting. We are finishing up our time here soon, and then next thing you know I will be starting a whole new part of track with a whole new set of things to learn from God and a whole new set of places to discover and love God’s beautiful wonderful people.
So to wrap things up, I am coming to accept is that even if this moment in my life feels dry, God is doing something bigger. Even if we aren’t doing missions work every day, that in the long run God wants to do something bigger. He wants to mold me and form me into who He wants me to be, and He wants to open all of our eyes to His love for the world and His faithfulness. It is incredible. He wants to reach the world through us. So even if I feel discouraged about my lack of action, I know that He is working things out in His own way and I can trust in that. It is awesome.
Blessings to all of you.
<3 Cambria
p.s. I am going to post this on both my blogs, cambriamichelle.blogspot.com and cambriamichelle.wordpress.com.
I am still trying to decide which i want to keep, since i made this for my time in sensitive countries i dont necessarily need it anymore, but wordpress is growing on me.
I have also discovered i am not so good at posting blogs, so id like to start sending e-mail updates weekly if possible, so if you would like to recieve those, post a comment with your e-mail address!
if you have questions feel free to e-mail me
cmfinzel@gmail.com
